There’s little reason for me to have to be studying and working for the next 15 days, except I care about my future. There’s little reason for me to have to be so stressed out during my few days off before a summer of research, except I care a great deal about my future. I wish that I could just relax for a little while, but I guess it’s about time for me to learn to relax under somewhat stressful conditions…
People keep telling me that the path I have chosen won’t be easy, and I’ve always known that. I have no intention of having a big family…well a bigger family (the family I’ve been given is large enough), and my intellectual pursuits have always been one of my greatest passions. I don’t think it will be a bad way to spend my life, but I often wonder about what could have happened had I chosen a different path.
Throughout the course of my life I’be had so many little goals, and personal promises. One day I’ll be on broadway, at least once. I’ll never give up theatre or singing. I’ll keep writing, and I’ll keep working on Love…just like Jonathan. Some of these things I have unfortunately given up out of lack of will power or necessity. I’m afraid of what other things I may have to give up during my life.
For now I suppose I’ll just have to try not to worry about it…and keep studying.